Published on October 16th, 2012 | by Jon Tanners0
Angelina Jolie Adopts Brad Pitt in Blackface
HOLLYWOOD – Angelina Jolie has shocked the world once again, this time by adopting her own husband in blackface.
Shockingly, it appears that Brad put on the make-up in hopes of creating a spark, taking advantage of Angelina’s humanitarian side. Instead, Ang started mothering Brad, insisting he never wash the embellishment off.
Eventually, Angelina unilaterally decided he would be added to her constantly growing collection of ethnic charges.
“It’s brought a new dynamic side to their family,” said close friend George Clooney. “I thought this was one of Brad’s adorable, brilliant, and sexy pranks at first. Now I can see it’s quite serious.”
What Pitt did not anticipate, however, was the effect the apparent race change would have on his acting career. In his last two films (Ocean’s 27 and 2 Fight 2 Club), Pitt has been disappointed to find that a script change now has his character dying off within the first fifteen minutes.
Despite the support of most of their friends, not all of the Jolie-Pitt clan have been so receptive to the idea.
A jealous Shiloh reportedly refused to come out of her room for days, complaining of her new sibling monopolizing all of her mom’s attention. Maddox has decided to improve his karate skills in hopes of “kicking that wigga’s ass.”
It is unclear if Pitt will change his last name to Jolie or if his penis followed suit.