Published on October 18th, 2012 | by TRI Staff0
Gucci Mane Gets Corneal Tattoos, Hundreds of Piercings In Hopes of Being Focus of More TRI Articles
“Gucci knew he had to step his game up.”
With designs on making TRI’s vaunted front page, Davis has released almost 80 mixtapes in 2012, unbeknownst to everyone.
The artist lamented: “TRI can only write article for artists with puns in they name. Gucci need more puns.”
Gucci’s proposed series of articles about animals with manes getting face tattoos was promptly shot down by TRI’s experienced, well-qualified and handsome editorial staff.
Without such a literary advantage, Mr. Mane has gone to extremes. Most notably, tattoo artist Shane Willoughby transformed Davis’ infamous ice cream face tattoo into a full body sundae, complete with a cherry nipples and a banana split penis.
In his quest for Insiderdom, Mr. Mane also visited several doctors in Los Angeles to request a reverse liposuction. “If Gucci look like Rick Ross, maybe TRI will make an article about fat Gucci!”
To solidify his standing with TRI, Davis has vowed to release no fewer than seventeen sex tapes before the end of the calendar year, most of which will involve Drake crying.